post from fb

"baby please dont go, if i wake up tomorrow will you still be here?? lets run away from these lies, back to yesterday. " 

I can almost imagine it, you still next to me, your skin and mine. your breath deep and steady, your heart in time with mine, 

"I feel the sun coming up like tick tock, trying to keep you in my head"

your arms are warm and strong, but your hands are soft and gentle. I can almost feel you here, enveloping me 

"baby please dont go go baby please dont go"

I was your world, your wonder, 

"you could watch me for a life time, my favorite movie" 

you told me so many times, you would never get bored, i promised i would never stop running to you. 

"you are a cinima, my hollywood treasure love you just the way you are."

did we lie to ourselves, to each other, could something to true and beautiful really be? 

"action, thriller"

we meant so much to each other, so very much, you were my dragon my light, you mean everything to me. 

"infect me with your poison kill me with your loving"

I never cared how light or dark, I never cared how good or evil or the grey in between, I only cared for you. My soul...

we promised forever, us against the world, I can feel your breath on my ear, hear you whisper my name, our warmth pressed into one another.  

"as long as you love me"

nothing else ever mattered, walk through the fire, demons and angels, kill and murder and die for you. 

"we could be starving, we could be homeless we could be broke"

as long as you loved me the world was right, no matter how many wrongs, but now its all upside down topsy turvey.  

where did we stop believing, where did we stop feeling the electricity the energy that connected us? 

"if you ever leave me baby, leave some morphine at my door"

with you gone, im not myself, im wrong and awkward. It's like Ive lost a leg, I have to relearn how to be how to live, 

"there is no sunshine since I lost you baby"

Im stuck between loving you and hating myself.  To see you happy and moving on sends me into jealous fits of rage, all I can think of is if you miss me, and how can you even think that she would love you like i do. 

"my heart is a battlefield, "

I can't think, I can't feel. So much anger and despair, 

"my heart melted to the ground found something so true, I never cared what they said im in love with you. "

but you cut me open and now im bleeding, my love is pouring out there is no end, there is no peace, no relief no release, you cut me open. 

What happened to us, how beautiful we were, how perfect a match we made, you took my darkness, my shame and made it beautiful, you took my shyness, all the parts i hated about myself and made them yours. something you loved...

Now im scarred and flawed and broken.... I just wanted your love, I just wanted to you, how did I miss what I had, how did I look over what we were.... 

"I let it fall, my heart, and as it fell you rose to claim it"

kissing you was like breathing, looking into your eyes was like coming home each and every time. you set fire to my world and my life, you made living worth it. how do i replace that feeling, how do i find that same spark inside me? 

"you set fire to the rain and you threw us into the flames"

forget the lies, forget the pain, take me back to when we danced and our family watched, where we kissed and it was the most beautiful and wonderful day of my life. 

you swore your life and love to me, just as I did to you...

"i'll stand beside you through the years, you'll only cry those happy tears and though I'll make mistakes, I'll never break your heart"

you swore and you lied.....